Reparenting your #innerchild is a beautiful act of giving to yourself that involves providing the nurturing and support that may have been lacking in your earlier years. Did you know that there are four pillars to this process? Together-discipline, #selfcare, joy, and emotional regulation offer a holistic approach to this transformative process.

✨Discipline may look like creating a foundation of structure, rituals, and routine in your daily life with the goal of bringing stability and security. Consistency is key, remember we want to provide a sense of safety and predictability that your inner child craves. #InnerChildReparenting #DisciplineMatters

✨Self-Care may look like prioritizing moments of self-love and well-being. Engaging in activities that nourish the body, mind, and soul. Each act of self-care communicates to your inner child that their needs are not just important but deserve attention. You matter. #SelfCareJourney #NurtureYourself

✨#joy may look like infusing your days with genuine happiness, spontaneity, and playfulness. Rediscover the activities that bring you pure joy, embrace the wonder and curiosity of the inner child. Here laughter becomes a healing melody.

✨Emotional Regulation may look like cultivating a mindful approach to navigate the ebb and flow of emotions. Identifying, validating, and regulating feelings without judgment. This creates a safe emotional haven for your inner child to flourish. #EmotionalWellness #MindfulLiving

Together, these pillars weave a tapestry of healing and transformation. It is an honor for me to share in this #journey of reparenting with you. You are now the wise parent-- taking responsibility to address those needs that were not met. #nurture, embrace, and #welcomehome your inner child. They have been waiting. #ReparentingJourney #InnerChildHealing #SelfLoveRevolution #innerwisdom #attachment #highervibes #massapequa #massapequatherapist #heal #wisdom #innerwisdom ...

What does your brain tell you when you experience an unexpected or disappointing event?

For many, the stories our #brain tells us about these events can lead us to feel unloved, unimportant, invisible, and forgotten.

Why would we give heed to these negative #narratives about our life experiences, especially when they create anger, pain, or isolation? It sounds counterintuitive indeed.

Remember, we are primed for #survival, and when there is uncertainty or unpredictability our brain reads this as a threat or danger. It jumps in with a story and it calls on the #unconscious for the details of this narrative. The details are driven by our #memories, conditioning, and self-beliefs. A negative story is better than uncertainty- right? Probably not.

We are triggered not by the event, but by the story our brain tells us about the event fueled by unconscious #fears and #beliefs.

The brain is not in the business of assuaging our #anxiety or making us #happy. It is concerned with survival and can often operate in overdrive or hypervigilance.

Separating ourselves from this process is essential if we are to achieve emotional regulation, healthier #relationships, confidence, and a grounded daily life.

Start by acknowledging this process. Witness it, jot it down, acknowledge it. Then share it like this "The story my brain tells me about ___ is ______." Be willing to acknowledge uncertainty, and the #truth--we can`t ever fully understand, under assumption alone, why anyone else does what they do.

Stay curious, stay humble, increase self-belief, and move beyond old narratives. Triggers can be our teachers, but only if we see them as opportunities to learn about ourselves versus opportunities to learn about others. Strive to act with consciousness, as this will always be the most direct path toward alignment with the truth of who you are.

#heal #massapequatherapist #relationships #growthmindset #insight #psychotherapy #ego #childhood #wisdom ...

✨”The #vitality of the private self depends on the capacity to generate #meaning;
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✨the ability to generate meaning is a ‘psychic triumph’ leading to mental #growth, expansion of #consciousness, deep pleasure, self regulation and #connection.
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✨The inability to make meaning is a ‘psychic catastrophe,’ leading to mental shrinkage, constricted consciousness, disorganization, fear, dysregulation, anxiety, disconnection, and loneliness.” - Modell & Tronick
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#makingmeaningmonday #massapequa #traumarecovery ...

What should couples therapy that is emotionally focused look like?
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✨In the first stage we are identifying failing communication strategies, calling them out, and stabilizing any negative #communication styles.
✨Next we begin to examine each individual’s #attachment history, their related attachment style, and then getting to the heart of how this attachment style + unmet attachment need drive the negative cycle in the relationship.
✨We now can move into the stage of building #empathy and understanding for each other. No one is “right” or “wrong.” We are operating in a relational #ecosystem.
✨This then allows movement toward both an increase in emotional #connection + space for a growing #bond.
✨Circling back to where we started, we begin to acknowledge #conflict is inevitable. Healthy problem solving and effective conflict resolution are real and essential.

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Couples have sometimes said “you’re our last chance.” They are reminded that I am here with them in their journey to find the truth; they then choose to do what they wish with this truth. They are empowered with #selfawareness, skills, and a realignment to the relational unit enough that they can do great things with the #truth if they wish.
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#massapequa #massapequatherapist #attachment #marriageiswork #marriagetherapy #tuesdaythoughts #growthmindset #love #bonding #repair #highervibes #heal
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Ever try to talk about something important or potentially conflictual with your partner only to have it go supremely bad? Let’s rewind the tape and see what may have gone wrong.
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Here are some key points to check in with before and during a difficult conversation:
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✨Is my #partner willing to take accountability and repair with me? Am I ready to do the same?
✨Am I ready to discuss this issue without getting back into conflict? Have I effectively self-soothed, am I feeling grounded around this issue? Do I believe I can better regulate my emotions/nervous system? Have I asked my partner where they are at on these points?
✨Do I now see my role in things?
✨Have I reflected on what I really NEED from my partner? This will greatly aid in reducing #criticism of one’s partner.
✨Am I ready to show empathy to my partner? Have I considered their perspective and am I ready to offer validity to that?
✨Am I ready and willing to see my partner as not just human, but different than me? Am I willing to honor this distinction and their subjective reality?
✨Am I fighting to be right or ready to bridge the gap and come together as allies —to move past the impasse and forge #growth?
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Remember, when dealing with #conflict, what matters most is HOW the conflict is managed, and essentially how quickly and effectively #repaired if it goes haywire.
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✨✨The trifecta of success is always #awareness #accountability and proper processing of unfinished business.
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#growthmindset #lovevibes #marriageadvice #relationshipgoals #change #heal #couples #couplesgoals #highervibes #awareness #attach #attitude #massapequa #masapequatherapist ...

Triggers are our #teachers.
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When we are triggered we automatically enter into a self-protective state. This is because we are experiencing, in the present, pain from our past that has not been released yet from the body.
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When we are brought back to this past unprocessed space in our body, we may act as though there is actual danger. We dive into fight/flight/freeze/fawn mode. We may develop tunnel vision. When our mind goes back we may experience poor processing of stimuli and emotional dysregulation. We may engage in cognitive distortion i.e. “I am unloved.” “I am being abandoned.” “I’ll never be enough.”
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Our mind and body are going back to a core wound created during the initial painful event. This may be why you feel like you are having a highly emotional reaction that is disproportionate to the event at hand.
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If we are committed to our growth, we may begin to use these moments as opportunities... to breed self awareness, to act with greater consciousness, to heal, to act in ways that are more aligned with the #truth of who we are.
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Consider these questions to get you started in making better use of your triggers.
✨In that present moment, what expectations did I have that were not met?
✨When expectations are not met, what feelings manifest?
✨When I feel threatened I usually respond or act in what way?
✨What role did I have in creating this moment/issue?
✨When I feel threatened or vulnerable, what defense mechanism do I use?
✨What is my true underlying fear in all of this?
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#self #awareness #growthmindset #highervibes #attachment #thursday #therapythursdays #ego #loss #heal #freedom #relationshipgoals #massapequa #massapequatherapist #in ...

To #love someone, and to identify with his or her struggles and #joys as if they were your own, you have to surrender some of your self.
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This can be tough for those operating with #ego, or for those #couples that have experienced relational neglect and subsequent loss of #trust.
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So what exactly does it mean to #surrender one’s self?
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It means, for a moment, to totally focus on your partner. To temporarily forego your own stance and concerns. To put yourself in your partner’s shoes, and really understand what they are saying. To communicate to your partner that their thoughts and feelings matter and make sense.
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So how easy is this for most couples? Not at all. What I see most is a desire and perspective that one IS offering this, while in actuality ego is still driving the response —which naturally prompts challenging , defensiveness, and minimizing.
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So how to get it right, or as close to right as possible ( remember effort should be celebrated just as much as proper execution).
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In these moments statements of empathy and understanding are paramount. They do NOT equal agreement, nor any hierarchy of emotional significance. They simply convey, in this moment that what you are feeling, thinking, experiencing, matters to me, and because I love you I want to understand you. .
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They may sound like:

✨You’re making total sense.
✨You are in a lot of pain. I can feel it
✨I wish you didn’t have to go through this.
✨This is very scary.
✨Tell me what you see as your choices here.
✨That would have hurt my feelings too.
✨I’m on your side.

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Today, consider how temporarily sacrificing yourself to make space for another-to show them they are “real” too —can ultimately create the #secure base and #connection your #relationship was meant to reflect.

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#wednesdaymood #wednesdaywisdom #innerpeace #attachment #couples #couplesgoals #innerhealing #healthier #highervibes #heal #self #insight #instafollow #massapequa #wednesdays #psychotherapynetworker ...

Effective #communication is the single most #healing tool available to #couples to rebuild #trust, establish #friendship, increase #intimacy and #safety, as well as effectively resolve conflict. Communication is the bridge that guides the couple back to a place of #shared-meaning, #hope, and #joy.
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But how is it done and why do so many couples struggle with this?
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The quick answer...communication is not an innate skill, it is learned through modeling and experience. So essentially your communication is only as healthy and effective as what you witnessed and experienced in early #relationships.
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So how to do it?
Here’s some quick tips:
✨Make it safe. Check your body language and emotional toll before attempting to be speaker or listener.
✨Show interest. As listener, ask for further information and give space. “What else are you feeling around this issue?”
✨As speaker, avoid assumptions, blame or “you” statements. Speak without the intention to hurt. Know your partners triggers and sore spots. Avoid them.
✨See fear behind anger. Be on the lookout for it. Call it out. Say, “ I see how upsetting/scary this is for you. What do you need from me in this moment?”
✨Leave your ego out of it. This isn’t about winning or being right.
✨Try to build habits around focusing on one partner at a time. No ping-pong matches.
✨Avoid defenses—criticism, defensiveness, contempt, projection. Look for the antidotes. Use them.
✨Use humor, touch, and employ self-soothing to avoid being overwhelmed physiologically and ultimately #stonewalling.
✨Repair, repair, repair. We will never always get it right. Repair goes a long way in conveying attunement, #respect, and #connection. “That came out wrong. This is what I am trying to say.”

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What new #skills are you willing to bring into your next conversation with your #partner?
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#higherconsciousness #highervibrations #couplegoals #massapequa #massapequatherapist #ego #self #wednesdaywisdom #insight #therapist #growthmindset #innerpeace #greateryou #attachmenttheory ...

We are all #storytellers. Our stories are critical #pieces to understanding and being #understood. They are shaped by our past experiences, our present feelings, and our future #dreams. They carve out our internal landscape and shape who we are. They become the foundation upon which we create culture with our partner.
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When we wish away our stories, the stories of our relationship, or those of our partner, we wish ourselves or other out of existence. It is nearly impossible to move forward without first understanding and giving space to these stories, however dicey or difficult.
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Encouraging story telling from our partner is essential and a gift of #turningtowards. How can you become a #curious #listener? How can you seek out the opportunities for #discovery? —remember, they are boundless.
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Today strive to create context to explore each other’s current fears, hopes, stressors, needs, and experiences. Create rituals around hearing these stories and sharing your own. Begin to ask bigger questions to get bigger #answers.
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✨Try this: “ what do you need right now in a #friend ? “

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#self #attachment #couplegoals #couplestherapy #innerwork #fridayvibes #intimacy #massapequa #massapequatherapist #highervibes #self #growthmindset @katetheo79 ...

Where a #couple is suffering through a perpetual problem, what most often has gone overlooked is the underlying #dream. What this means is that the couple has not given space to identifying and deeply understanding the #core feelings and #beliefs beneath the surface of this #symbolic conflict.
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What is a dream? Well, it often relates to an earlier unmet need or value that may promote safety or #purpose, among other things. It can relate to having a sense of freedom, to having adventure, to getting over a personal fear, or having a sense of order in ones world. Dreams are varied and subjective. Very often, these dreams are born out of stories from #childhood or past experiences—losses, regrets, unfulfilled wishes, pains.
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The goals become to move from gridlock to dialogue around this issue, and then to work toward a #commitment to creating space to #honor this within the relationship.
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Many couples are relieved to hear that the goal here is not necessarily to solve this issue or resolve the conflict—it may always be there..it’s perpetual—and there is no expectation for one partner to fix this or change for the other. The goal is simply to breed dialogue, insight, and #honor into the union.
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Many couples feel good with these #goals. They both feel valued and influential - there is no “winner.”
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Want to try to work on this? The most perfect and basic way to begin may be to simply share, “help me understand why this is so important to you.” Open up space to hear the dream. To learn the #wish. To know the needs and fears associated with this dream never being realized. Once you deeply understand, it can be hard NOT to want to allow this dream to be realized for your partner.
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#couplegoals #therapy #therapythursdays #insight #growthmindset #heal #self #insta @diztantdreamer ...

#Sacrifice is a bogus #love. It doesn’t really serve anyone. A #reallove extends its self and #creates. Sacrifice often ends with self abasement and resentment. It is a counterfeit #commitment that withholds the most basic #giving and #receiving. It is closed off versus open. It keeps track. What’s worse, when we are in sacrifice, we are withholding ourselves creating a slew of imbalance in the relationship.
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What do we really want to accomplish with sacrifice? Sacrifice can be a form of avoidance- tied often to feelings of unworthiness, guilt or shame. It can be an overcompensation tied with fears or beliefs rooted in past failures or experiences. It can be a means to control and right some wrongs of the past.
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Knowing the difference between sacrifice and love centers us in the #truth of who we are and what we truly want our #relationship to be. How can you begin to move out of sacrifice and into the vulnerabilities and unpredictability of true #giving and receiving —or love. In as much as it is the truth that It is only in true giving that we receive—what do you hope to receive in your relationship? Today try to begin that conversation as a first step toward #reciprocity, #connection, and #creation.
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#therapythoughts #couples #couplegoals #relationshipgoals #therapy #massapequatherapist #higherself #growthmindset #self #consciousness #innerpeace ...

The #ego is that part of you that lives just outside of your #conscious #awareness- directing thoughts, feelings, and reactions in a sort of auto-pilot mode. Essentially, it is the story of you, based on your past lived experiences, and internalized messages of worth and value. While the #ego helps you to navigate the world and to make sense of things, it can also cause great suffering. This is because it is covert, and it overestimates danger and likes to keep you “safe” which often=small/predictable.
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Harnessing the true potential #power of the ego, happens only when you can challenge the endless mental chatter about self, other and world. In doing this, you begin to move beyond a small predetermined story of you and other and into an observing, non judgmental, and inquisitive role. You may begin to see you are not your thoughts, and others are not the thoughts you have of them. You are moving away from traditional ego #strategies of defensiveness, blame, and #projection. ...Instantly braver, wiser, able to examine the world with openness. A transition from what does this say about YOU, to what does this say about #ME.
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Ego + awareness is what allows this construct to guide you instead of rule you. ✨How can you expand on the story of you today?

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#massapequa #massapequatherapist #psychotherapy #growthmindset #greateryou #attachmenttheory #consciousness #innerpeace #innerknowing #selflove #freedom #heal #friday #fridayvibes ...

A common complaint in #couples work-my partner used to be different: more fun, more sexual, more adventurous, more tuned into me. While some of these transitions/losses may have taken place because of past injuries in the relationship, and thereby enduring resentments, (and as such, a processing of these would be necessary, and can evoke enough healing to begin to breathe life back into these relationship qualities) other times we may need to honor that our partner has simply changed. Long-term relationships hold the unique quality of us being able to witness the many “deaths” and “rebirths” that take place in our partner’s character. Life itself, personal experience, growth, choices to move in a different direction than we expected, and emotional and physical challenges may all change a person from who they once were in our eyes. While it is normal to hope for the return of some of these earlier sparks, or predictable behaviors, it is not fair, nor productive, to hold our partner accountable to some old version of them self. It is instead necessary to grieve together, recognizing and honoring these losses and in dong so move toward a lifting that evokes new character formations and renewed intrigue of our partner. Our partner changing can erase some old sense of predictability we held in our relationship. Letting go of this can naturally stir up anxieties. Acceptance may not be easy during times of unsteady transition, yet it is precisely what is needed if you wish to create fertile ground for abounding growth. Acceptance creates the security and freedom necessary to explore and to evolve. Remember, #change is often preceded by some necessary darkness or discomfort. Simply insisting that things be just as they were is very often a sign of our own #ego fears of losing control, instead of being rooted in #trust —that goodness is not lost but can come to us in unforeseen forms.
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#relationshipgoals #couplegoals #change #loss #attachmentstyles #attachmenttheory #psychology #psychotherapy #selflove #freedom #growthmindset #acceptance #massapequa #massapequatherapist #life #lettinggo #insight #heal @galaxigabriel ...

The #innerchild is something we all carry with us. It is made up of our earliest experiences (usually birth through the age of 5) and influences our core beliefs, our sense of #self / #other, our emotional intelligence and ability to regulate and #soothe. These together form the basis of our relational strategies and dynamics. Wow! ..that’s quite a #powerful influence. Our inner child is only as healthy as we were seen, heard, validated, and #secure in our early life. It’s no wonder a neglected or #wounded inner child of the past can be major source of adult misery. You may experience your own inner child during moments that draw from the past all-too familiar feelings or beliefs.
Imagine a scared, angry, or sad 5-year-old calling the shots in your day. What would that look like? How would that feel? What types of experiences would that create for you? What would you say to that 5-year-old? What would that 5-year-old have to say to you? Let`s begin a dialogue with that inner child today.
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#friday #massapequa #massapequatherapist #attachmenttheory #relationshipgoals #couples #therapy #growthmindset #insight #heal #ego #childhood #wisdom #innerpeace
@indg0 ...

#Relationships are our mirror. They reflect back to us our ego’s fragile view of love, other, and self. Where the #ego sets out to “defend” and “protect” it sees things to fear, control, and change. It reveals our earliest parent-child dynamics and the ways in which we were conditioned in areas of #trust, #acceptance, #connection, and #safety.
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Relationships always have a strong proclivity to act out early experiences and disowned parts of self—the biggest loss is we are not creating a relationship of present mindedness nor are we #self-actualizing within it. Instead, we are recreating pain, looking for the bad guy, trying to escape and get out of the game, we are aiming to blame instead of witnessing the ways we still need to #heal and acknowledging the areas we still need to work on.
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Relationship recovery always entails embarking on one’s #self and a #journey of compassion and #truth. It takes work, a lot of it, (after all we are unraveling years of conditioned responses and tightly tucked away parts of self). It takes a great deal of self reflection in order to create a #maturelove reflective of your greatest self. It takes the willingness to examine our #shadow, or the parts we have hidden away because of shame. These are the parts are ego has convinced us are not our own, but are reflected back to us in those painful moments with our #partner.
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You can have a #freeing, #accepting #love. You can have a love that is flexible, #authentic, and #affirming. But it all starts with #you.

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#wednesdayvibes #wednesdaywisdom #therapist #heal #attachmenttheory #massapequa #massapequatherapist #relationshipgoals #couplestherapy #psychotherapy #journey #greatest #selflove @kamila.lenarcik ...

#Wisdom is the great comforter. When we harness this #power, we pass over the #shadows of rigidity, superiority, and self-centeredness. Black and white logic is abandoned in favor of an #intuitive knowledge that is flexible and forgiving: that allows for imperfections and transcends self righteousness. It is no longer true that good people only do all good things or have only all good qualities. We witness the suffering and confusion in us as a magnification of these conditions in others. Our sense of #self is no longer disrupted by the difficulties we have endured. Clarity allows us to feel safe, #whole and grounded once again. We are humbled and soothed by our wisdom. Today our wisdom sets us #free.

✨Where your #heart holds #bitterness, ask yourself, “what do I still need to learn or understand?”
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#carljung #carljungquotes #jungianpsychology #therapy #therapytuesday #massapequamoms #massapequatherapist #collectiveunconscious #heal #growthmindset #innerpeace #psychotherapy #selflove #freedom #individuation #relationshipgoals #couplestherapist ...

We were all a “we” before we became an “I”. Early on, our #identity and sense of #self was dependent on another..their availability, attunement, love, patience and sensitivity. Their mirroring face showed us that we #mattered or didn’t.

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During these early stages of vulnerability and dependence, our “l” can all too easily become distorted. A #corewound develops that we can spend our entire life trying to cover up with #ego defenses. We deny, project, and deflect our reality to stay safe, but no matter we have experienced the biggest #loss — of self. Without an “I” we look outside of ourselves to prove our worth and to feel #whole.

In adult life and relationships this may look like like
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➿Excessive neediness
➿Dismissiveness of partner
➿Chronic cheating
➿Perpetual disappointment in relationship after relationship
➿Addiction
➿Narcissistic parenting
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To heal we need to allow ourselves to experience the fear, anger and sadness we were never able to. We must allow ourselves to grieve the legitimate suffering we endured, and all the feelings we could not feel when we lost our childhood or ourself. #Grief is the the #healing feeling.
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Recovering these feelings we make contact with our inner child once again. Be their ally. Allow #trust to build again. Allow there to be relief. This could be the first step in one of the most #joyous events —the reunion, and reclaiming of your true #self.

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#fridayvibes #fridaymood #therapy #psychotherapy #massapequatherapist #massapequa #innerchild #innerchildhealing #higherconsciousness #selfcare #freedom #mindfulness #instadaily @kamila.lenarcik ...

#Anger is a disguise that we hide behind. It is a way of controlling in order to get our needs met —we get angry instead of getting #vulnerable.
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Anger often signals a lack of #trust or #fear— that unless we control we won’t get what we need. That others can’t really be trusted. That we can’t be trusted.

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We create a vicious cycle that often ends with alienating the very person who could meet our needs and #soothe us.

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Letting go of anger we see more deeply into our partner. We look beyond the past #hurt, their mistakes, and the fear. We instead move toward our partner. They are our #ally.

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✨What anger are you holding onto? ✨What fear lies behind this? ✨Who would you become if you abandoned this anger and got real? ✨If you admitted your fears and trusted that they would be validated? ✨What would you create If you let go of #control and allowed others the #freedom to be truly who they are? Begin to step toward your partner again. ..Toward yourself again. What do you need to begin to trust? What does your haven of safety look like?

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#tuesday #therapytuesday #instadaily #relationshipgoals #couplestherapy #highervibes #letgo #massapequa #marriagegoals #inside #awareness #massapequatherapist #self #psychology #intimacy #healthandwellness #connection #attachmentstyles @karencantuq ...

#Relationships are tricky.
They are a confusing mix of space in which we #heal and that in which we are harmed. .

For many, the wounds that erupt in our earliest relationships occurred beyond our #awareness. We unknowingly carry them forward, not realizing their impact on future relationship, choices, and all the failing approaches to change we may have tried. We are only left with feelings of shame, unworthiness, and a deep sense of ineffectiveness in making things better. .

We don’t notice that we are recreating what has been modeled, or ‘given.’ We confuse familiar feelings for #attraction and chemistry. We begin to compulsively and unknowingly recreate the past to right some wrong. We are waiting to receive what we always needed. .

Healing begins where we lean toward a #consciousness of self and other. From here grows #compassion, and a new way of relating —accountability, boundaries, choices that align us with our innate drive to move forward— and the chance to honestly reveal ourselves for who we are and what we want. .

Consider: . ✨What was missing from the way you were treated as a child? ✨How did this effect who you have become and the way you feel about yourself today? ✨What did you learn about love from how your parents treated each other and how they treated you?
✨How do you blame your partner for making you feel the way you have always felt? ✨How do you provoke your partner to hurt you in ways that you are used to being hurt?
✨What do you need most to feel safe, secure, and valued? .
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Find someone who can help you sort through these questions and answers and who can #support your efforts in healing and in learning to love honestly-with #health, #connection, and freedom.
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#saturdayvibes #relationshipgoals #massapequa #massapequatherapist #awareness #growthmindset #maritaltherapy #couplegoals #couplestherapy #therapist #therapy #heal #freedom #love #connection #innerknowing #healthandwellness #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #eft @indg0 ...

We like to believe that what we see is the exact #truth. At an emotional level we become quite reluctant to see our partner’s point of view and #perception as valid, especially when it is cloaked in #criticism. .

How would your relationship transform if you began to acknowledge .
➿Most of your partner’s criticism of you has some basis of reality. Ask -How do I feel or what do I think of when my partner points this out to me? What is my emotional reaction or how intense is my defense against this? How are these #feelings and thoughts familiar to me? Have I ever felt this way about anyone else in my early life? .
➿Many of your repetitious, emotional criticisms of your partner are disguised statements of your own unmet #needs. Each criticism is a call for #connection and a bid to turn toward each other once again. “You are so self absorbed and obsessed with working out. I can’t stand it!” is a cover for “I feel distant from you when you miss dinners with the family. I need to spend more evenings with you. “ Criticism is surefire way to sabotage our need to being #heard and understood. .
➿Some of your criticism of your partner may be a more accurate description of a #disowned part of your #self. This is where #projection comes in and why #shadow work, or understanding all the disowned parts of our self, is so important. Without it the the “lost self” roams free , unexamined and very influential. A criticism of our partner then becomes a clue about a wish we have for ourself or an undeveloped or repressed area of our psyche. .

Criticism holds hidden information vital to the growth of ourselves and #relationships. It reveals our deepest needs and parts of self we hide taway. If we are courageous enough to see things differently than we ever have before, we create an opportunity for greater self knowing and in that more fulfilling connections with others. .
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@emoji_of_a_wave ...